Diary of Lady Gilliana Von Graffenstein, Dog

Given further complications from my accident, I have decided to turn over the blog to my dog Gilly, who, quite frankly, has more time for it.

April 21, 2025

Dear Diary,

We were all quite surprised by the sudden snowfall this week, given that we are weeks deep into Spring's promise. Mother was aghast, but I quite like the snow. My thick fur coat makes the low temperature pleasant, and I enjoy the squishy texture. It is far better than the awful rain, which is far too close to a bath for my comfort.

Mother declined my invitation to spend the day outside, so I was forced to amuse myself. The snow had made the ground rather soft and, like any good Victorian lady, I have a keen interest in the exciting field of archeology. I decided to make a scientific study of the backyard, and see what treasures could be dug up from beneath my ve

ry toes. The hours simply flew by, although I did not find anything.

I trotted in to see if I could beg an early dinner from Mama, only to be met with a shriek of horror and a firm command to "Stay!" My endeavors had coated me in mud, which was now forming an accusatory trail behind me.

I stopped and cowered, for I do hate being chided. This was followed by the utter indignity of a bath, and a toweling before I could escape to my safest hidey-hole to wallow in my sorrow.

Was I a bad dog? Mother never said so, but why else would she give me a bath? Clearly I had lost her love, and thus gave over to despair. I refused to come out for dinner or toys. Not even the promise of cuddles could bring my from my cave of safety.

Mother finally coaxed me out with some bits of hot dog. Perhaps she does love me after all.

New Cover, Updated Ad

I have an awesome new cover, which now features the tentacles of the evil monster threatening the city. What better way to show off a new cover than with an updated version of this gorgeous ad?

Please enjoy

It's been a minute

Hello friends,

It got really cold here, and with the cold came a whole lot of pain. But now that it's warmer things are better and I can type again.

One thing I learned from the arctic freeze is that I am no longer willing to be my dog's butler. The constant opening and closing of a sliding glass door was really hard on my already aching arms. So I finally broke down and got a dog door. One of those ones that go in the grooves for the door you already have. My awesome brother in law even came in and installed it for me.

Gilly hated it. The bottom of the dog door has a magnetic seal to help keep the weather out, but whenever it closes it makes a slappy sound that she cannot abide, and refuses to negotiate.

It has taken a week of coaxing, patience, and cheese to get her to trust the door and embrace her new found freedom. I still have to hold the flap up for her when she first goes out in the morning. But after we perform the morning ritual of proving that the flappy door will not kill her, she comes and goes as she pleases.